I've just come in from a run in the rain and had my ipod on shuffle, and one of the songs that came on was "Simple Man" by Lynyrd Skynyrd. While it's not my typical running playlist type, the song really struck me. I've been doing a lot of reflection in the past week (my work contract came to an end, so I'm unemployed for the moment) so this means I have nothing but time on my hands.
Part of my reflections has been to look into my past, and much to my thankfulness and amusement, one of my best friends since the age of 4 now lives in London so we've been swapping stories. We can remember growing up and hating school to no end- constantly sitting in the principals office and challenging all the rules that we felt were (and indeed were) ridiculous. One of my biggest memories as a young girl was that I ALWAYS talked about travelling and seeing the world, and being "my own woman" which is something my dad proudly taught me to say. When I would be dragging my feet down the hallways of school, I would remind myself that someday I would be free to do whatever I want. This rightfully scared the shit out of my parents.
As of today, I have been all over the world, I've experienced love and loss, and I've worked hard and played even harder. And after being all over the world and doing some amazing things, I am reminded of something: I will always be Lauren. The location doesn't make me a different person, it might enrich my life and provide me with insight but I am ultimately the same Lauren at the end of the day. Some people travel to places like India to find themselves (hey, I've done it too) and while travelling to places like India is an experience that everyone should go through- it doesn't make you find yourself, all that happens if that you solidify your understanding of who you already are.
Is this a bit deep?
This has all been more of a fleeting thought, I should really share them more often- let all my nonsense out of captivity!
Something else that I've really come to terms with in the past 6 years of my life is that we are all ultimately the same all around the world. Aside from our basic human needs like sustenance and shelter, we all want to experience love, we all want to be able to support ourselves, and we all want to feel worthy to be in this world. Many of us want to be part of something that is bigger than ourselves, and some want to leave behind some kind of legacy. No matter where I am in the world, everyone I meet shares some of these fundamental needs and desires and the interesting part is how people go about achieving them.
Right, I've gone in a bit deep again it seems. I was beginning to think that Prison Break was rotting my brain.
Since my last post I've completed my assignment at my job, I've been on a trip to Cyprus, I somehow got tickets to the Royal Enclosure at the Royal Ascot, and I've gotten back onto a health kick.
I can imagine I will be posting more fleeting thoughts and ideas in between rotting my brain during endless episodes of Prison Break (I can't stop watching Wentworth Miller, sorry Vince).
More to come soon.
xx
